Apparently, our daycare provider works undercover for Similac. The evidence:

1) He once said, "Has she started formula yet?" I said, no, still breastmilk. He said, "Oh, the milk in her bottles looks like formula." It seems he must have been a member of the Future Farmers of Vietnam prior to coming to this country 12 years ago, and can tell the difference between the fresh-squeezed-nectar of my boobs and it's synthetic cousin just by the way it sits in the bottle. Or at least he thinks he can.

2) Every morning, I fill out a sheet about Juniper's eating, pooping, and sleeping, and every morning in the little box on the form I write: "Breastfed at 7:00 a.m." We then discuss this, as in, he says, "When did she last eat?" and I say, "7:00." He then says, "How many ounces did she eat?" and I say: "I don't know, she breastfed." This always seems to be news to him, and he says, "Oh, really?"

3) Every day, my kid only consumes a drop or two of milk from a bottle while she's in daycare. Yes, this is disconcerting, especially since she's a skinny little waif of a baby, but at this point, it's her choice and she's just being stubborn. Today he had a new suggestion for this problem. While cooing at her during our daily-hand-wringing-she-won't-eat-conversation, he said: "Baby no like breastmilk! She want formula!"