Admission of guilt

Posted by jdg | Tuesday, October 24, 2006 |

Let this be a warning to all you parents of eight-month olds out there: sure, they're plump and cuddly and can't do anything but smile and poop and cry a little and you can take them to the pumpkin patch and prop them up and take pictures and they're so adorable you buy a 64-oz tub of pumpkin butter you'll never eat from the pumpkin guy because you're just so grateful to be there taking pictures of your little princess among his pumpkins.

Then, you turn around and it's a year later, and you pull up to a pumpkin patch on the side of the road to take pictures, and before you know it your little princess is screaming, "PUMPKIN!" over and over at the top of her lungs and she won't get up without convulsing unless you bring a pumpkin with you, and then you find yourself scurrying along the road with a screaming child under one arm and a stolen pumpkin under the other. That's right, parents of eight-month olds. One day you'll find yourself driving through the autumn foliage with the orange glow of a pumpkin patch fading behind you, your child happily hugging a pumpkin in her car seat. And when you look at yourself in the rear-view mirror all you'll see is a pumpkin thief.